As I enter into the end of my last trimester, I am beginning to remember what some have termed the fourth trimester. The fourth trimester is the next 3 months where you and your child are transitioning with him/her living on the outside of the womb and you are finding your way as a parent. With this newfound journey, there are definitely some unique bumps or curves in the road that some may have told you about and others have not. So here are some pointers to help ease the transition. Note this is not just for moms but also you dads out there. :)
1. Buy your partner a nice maternity/nursing outfit for the hospital. Let's face it, the mom will be exhausted and feeling that her body was turned inside out. A hospital gown does not help you feel any better. Plus you add in nursing, well with a hospital gown it is not easy to be discreet. Hooter hiders are great but you may not want to be putting that on every time you nurse. There are lots of options for a maternity nightgown, tank/shirt or dress. You bet I already have an outfit washed and ready to take with me!
2. Stock up on maxi pads. It may or may not have been mentioned but you will bleed for anywhere from a few days to weeks after giving birth. The first few days following child birth, increased vaginal discharge called lochia will occur regardless of delivery type. Lochia consists of blood, sloughed off tissue from the lining of the uterus and bacteria. The amount of discharge will change and lessen over the next few weeks. It is important to note that if your lochia is still bright red after four days, you experience a foul odor or fever, and/or you are saturating a heavy pad every hour you want to notify your MD. It is not recommended to wear tampons at this time, hence time to stock up on maxi pads. In the beginning you might need heavy duty and then can transition to a lighter pad. In any case, dads you might have to do some shopping in the beginning, so get used to putting them in your cart. You might even practice before the baby is here, and grab some pads and then shop away. Trust me, the more you practice the easier it becomes.
3. Consider a waterproof mattress pad. If able I would get this before the baby arrives, just in case your water breaks at night. However, you will likely still be needing it. If you are nursing, you will likely experience the lovely breast leakage at night. And, yes breast pads are available, but sometimes they can only hold so much. And speaking of holding so much, well diapers too will sometimes fail. And if you are snuggling with the little one on your bed and feel something warm all of a sudden, well the diaper may have leaked. In any case, having one or two waterproof mattress pads to rotate may be helpful.
4. Honoring where you are emotionally. A new child can bring an array of emotions for both moms and dads. It is commonly misconceived that mothers are the only ones who can experience post partum. The truth is that both parties can experience it. Yes, women are undergoing an enormous about of hormonal changes, but just the act of being a new parent can come with its own set of stressors. It is also thought that post partum can only occur in the first few weeks, but this too is not true. It can happen really at any time, even during the third trimester to when the child is age 1. Please keep communication open with your partner, and honor what you are feeling. Lack of sleep, changes in routines such as exercise and hydration and financial stress can all contribute to the varied array of emotions. Here are some websites that may be helpful in navigating some of the emotions. Note Penny Simkin, PT is a great resource for women who have been abused. Survivors of abuse may experience new feelings, such as anger with nursing, which can be related back to abuse. Penny Simkin has provided a resource for women to manage these symptoms, understand she is not alone, and give resources to help heal some of the wounds which may be been re-opened. Check out these links below:
6. Stay Hydrated and well fed. New baby means new routine. Making even a sandwich can seem like a daunting task. You will become very skilled a one handed cooking, but in the meantime get the help you need. Know that even grocery stores like VONs and amazon fresh will deliver groceries. There are also meal delivery services which can accommodate dietary needs. Lastly, there are programs like blue apron which deliver the groceries and proved step by step instructions on how to cook the meal. This is the time to eat well to help rebalance your body from lack of sleep, hormonal fluctuations and nutrients lost if nursing. Part of balancing the body and for those nursing to maintain your milk supply, is to remain hydrated. So drink your water. Have a water bottle by your bed, by the chair you tend to feed the baby in and in the car. Here are some websites for food delivery services:
7. Re-establishing core. Pregnancy can definitely change a woman's body, and for men you may have changed as well. Men can experience couvade syndrome, which is can include weight gain, hormonal fluctuation and even morning sickness. In any case, both mom and dads will be lifting and carrying random baby paraphernalia, and new beautiful baby whose weight will constantly be increasing. It is important for both parents to ensure that core is working efficiently and effectively. I personally believe every women would benefit from her abdominals being checked for possible separation called diastasis, pelvic floor activation and recruitment and overall postural alignment as the body will shift with pregnancy. If possible, have your OB check you for a diastasis and pelvic floor activation. If time is limited in appointments, ask for a PT referral where the PT can help re-establish posture, pelvic floor activation and core coordination. In any case, be aware that you want to do your best to activate your pelvic floor, lower belly and keep your back in neutral. Lastly, studies are limited but some women have benefited from the use of post partum abdominal binders. Typically binders are provided with c-sections. In this case, the binders are not only assisting in abdominal activation but also helping to restore the connective tissue stretched with pregnancy. Even in the case of a vaginal delivery, a binder post partum can also assist with restoring connective tissue but please note that it does not take the place of restoring abdominal activation and coordination.
8. Hormonal supplementation. During the post partum period, hormones will fluctuate and can leave you feeling an array of emotions. Sometimes emotions are passed off as "normal", when there is an underlying treatable hormonal imbalance. Such imbalances are thyroid. Also note that some OBs may recommend a hormonal estrogen cream used vaginally to assist with restoring pelvic floor integrity and assist with healing of any vaginal tearing which may have occurred in labor.
9. Get moving to increase energy versus exhaust yourself. Weight gain in pregnancy can happen with both parents. It is common to want to lose the baby weight and get back into pre-pregnancy clothes and most people head back to the gym or to bootcamps. This can be a great stress relief, but it can also increase stress. With lack of sleep, the body has little time to repair and restore oneself. In this case, the body is more catabolic, i.e. in a breaking down mode. Adding the stress of high intensity exercise can further break the body down, which can inhibit metabolism and weight loss. Thus it is important to establish how exhausted or restored one feels prior to exercising. If feeling exhausted, the best exercise can be a gentle stretching/yoga program or even a nice walk.
10. Be clear what others can do to help. You will be surrounded by friends and family who want to help you. It is common for people to bring food and sometimes the food is not what you are craving or wanting. So before the little one arrives, think about what others can do for you. It can as simple as changing sheets on the bed, washing and prepping some veggies, cleaning or even picking up certain foods at the grocery store. If you have certain foods you like, then take a snap shot so you can help those who are helping you :) A great website, mealtrain.com, can help you and your friends organize food delivery and meal planning.
You are in for an amazing transition in life. As with all transitions, stress can ensue but how you handle can influence its impact on your body. Do your best to remain flexible within your routines, do your best to sleep when you can and know that on the hardest of days and/or nights that this too shall pass. |
