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A COURSE IN MIRACLES
CH 24 SPECIALNESS AND SEPARATION
IV. THE FORGIVENESS OF SPECIALNESS
32 The special ones are all asleep, surrounded by a world of loveliness they do not see. Freedom and peace and joy stand there beside the bier on which they sleep and call them to come forth and waken from their dream of death. Yet they hear nothing. They are lost in dreams of specialness. They hate the call that would awaken them, and they curse God because He did not make their dream reality. Curse God and die, but not by Him Who made not death, but only in the dream. Open your eyes a little; see the savior God gave to you that you might look on him and give him back his birthright. It is
yours.
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A COURSE IN MIRACLES
WORKBOOK for STUDENTS
Voice and Music by CIMS SonShip Radio
Sin is insanity. It is the means
by which the mind is driven mad, and seeks
to let illusions take the place of truth.
And being mad, it sees illusions where
the truth should be, and where it really is.
Sin gave the body eyes, for what is there
the sinless would behold? What need have they
of sights or sounds or touch? What would they hear
or reach to touch? What would they sense at all?
To sense is not to know. And truth can be
but filled with knowledge, and with nothing else.
The body is the instrument the mind
made in its striving to deceive itself.
Its purpose is to strive. Yet can the goal
of striving change. And now the body serves
a different aim for striving. What it seeks
for now is chosen by the aim the mind
has taken as replacement for the goal
of self-deception. Truth can be its aim
as well as lies. The senses then will seek
instead the witnesses to what is true.
Sin is the home of all illusions, which
but stand for things imagined, issuing
from thoughts which are untrue. They are the "proof"
that what has no reality is real.
Sin "proves" God's Son is evil; timelessness
must have an end; Eternal Life must die.
And God Himself has lost the Son He loves,
with but corruption to complete Himself,
His Will forever overcome by death,
love slain by hate, and peace to be no more.
A madman's dreams are frightening, and sin
appears indeed to terrify. And yet
what sin perceives is but a childish game.
The Son of God may play be has become
a body, prey to evil and to guilt,
with but a little life that ends in death.
But all the while his Father shines on him,
and loves him with an Everlasting Love
which his pretenses cannot change at all.
How long, oh Son of God, would you maintain
the game of sin? Shall we not put away
these sharp-edged children's toys? How soon will you
be ready to come home? Perhaps today?
There is no sin. Creation is unchanged.
Would you still hold return to Heaven back?
How long, oh holy Son of God, how long?
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L e s s o n 259
Let me remember that there is no sin.
<AUDIO><VIDEO>
Voice and Music by CIMS SonShip Radio
Sin is the only thought that makes the goal
of God seem unattainable. What else
could blind us to the obvious, and make
the strange and the distorted seem more clear?
What else but sin engenders our attacks?
What else but sin could be the source of guilt,
demanding suffering and punishment?
And what but guilt could be the source of fear,
obscuring God's creation; giving love
the attributes of fear and of attack?
Father, I would not be insane today.
I would not be afraid of love, nor seek
for refuge in its opposite. For love
can have no opposite. You are the Source
of everything that is. And everything
that is remains with You and You with it.
~ Original Handscript of ACIM
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ACIM Edmonton - Sarah's Reflections
LESSON 259
Let me remember that there is no sin.
Sarah's Commentary:
This Lesson says, "Sin is the only thought that makes the goal of God seem unattainable." (W.259.1.1) What is that thought? It is the thought that I have done something so horrendous I could never attain my innocence again. It is the thought that I am lost forever because of the "badness" of my being for which I have to suffer. How could I go to God when I have so much to undo? Not only do we hold this belief in our unconscious minds, but we believe we have killed God in order to exist. While this is an unconscious belief, on a conscious level, we believe the things we have thought and done have altered who we are. Now it seems it will be a very long and arduous journey that will take many years, if not lifetimes, to undo our many wrong doings.
We have become blinded to the truth, and therefore, it appears that the ". . . strange and the distorted seem more clear." (W.259.1.2) In other words, the seeming reality of this world seems more clear and obvious than the truth. All of the problems and issues are seen as if they are what is real and true. We see our own wrongdoings, and it seems obvious to us that there must be consequences for what we have done. The bigger the sin, the more we must pay. Our strange and distorted thought system of sin and guilt has projected out a strange and distorted world staring back at us. It all seems so real, so we believe we have to protect and defend ourselves from perceived attack. We think we deserve the punishment the world seems to deliver because of what we believe we have coming to us. If Jesus tells us we have done nothing and we remain innocent, why do we insist on holding onto our belief in sin and guilt except that it protects us from God's Love? The only reason we want this protection is because we still value the separation. We still prefer to hold onto our own thoughts, which ". . . make the goal of God seem unattainable." (W.259.1.1)
This cycle of guilt, punishment, suffering, and more guilt, keeps us in a state of fear. We believe we deserve punishment because we are guilty and are therefore unworthy of joy, health, abundance, and happiness. These are the thoughts we live with, believing there is something we have done wrong even though we don't completely know what it is. And this brings feelings of not being OK, of not being worthy, of always trying to improve ourselves, and of feeling there is something lacking in us. Only when we fully accept our innocence can the door to abundance and wholeness be open to us. It is not something we need to attain; our innocence is assured. We are already complete, whole, and guiltless, but we block this truth about ourselves because we actually prefer to hold onto the belief we are guilty. This attraction to guilt is actually our attraction to our separate, seemingly independent selves we cherish. Yet when we hold onto the separate self, we live in a state of fear, and we don't believe we are deserving of happiness, abundance, joy, and peace.
The movie, "The Words" exemplifies a lifelong process of self-punishment and self-judgment because of guilt. The ego approves of this. In fact, Jesus says that the ego considers this holy. Yet Jesus says, "You whose mind is darkened by doubt and guilt, remember this: God gave the Holy Spirit to you, and gave Him the mission to remove all doubt and every trace of guilt that His dear Son has laid upon himself." (T.13.XI.5.1) (ACIM OE T.13.V.39) He asks that we not feel guilty ". . . because the Holy Spirit will undo all the consequences of my wrong decision if I will let Him." (T.5.VII.6.10) (ACIM OE T.5.IX.96) Yet when we don't allow this for ourselves, we live with a lot of suffering. It is not necessary.
I had a situation in my life where I felt very guilty for judging a friend. I realized, in talking with Don, I was still holding this against myself, feeling the guilt and shame for something I had done about 35 years ago. Don reminded me that nothing real had happened. I could forgive myself for what never happened except in my mind. Yet I was still carrying this situation because I felt I still needed to do something to make up for my guilt that was still there over this situation. The question is---how long does it take to release oneself from the cross? I found I was actively keeping my innocence from my own awareness. I had made many attempts with my friend to try to rectify the situation but she still kept her distance. There was no answer in form I could undertake and so, I finally surrendered and gave it all over to the Holy Spirit and put the situation in His Hands. And not surprisingly, recently she crossed my path after not seeing her for about ten years and it was like nothing had happened. There was a beautiful joining. I was reminded once again; no problem can be solved by our own actions. The only answer is with the Holy Spirit. "He is swift to utilize whatever you offer Him on behalf of this (truth)." (T.15.VIII.1.4) (ACIM OE T.15.IX.79) So let us not put ourselves in charge of our own issues. "Refuse not the awareness of your completion, and seek not to restore it to yourself." (T.15.VIII.3.3) (ACIM OE T.15.IX.81)
Jesus is calling us to recognize that ". . . what sin perceives is but a childish game. The Son of God may play he has become a body, prey to evil and to guilt, with but a little life that ends in death. But all the while His Father shines on him, and loves him with an everlasting Love which his pretenses cannot change at all." (W.PII.Q4.4.2-4) Thank goodness despite what we think we have done we have not been able to change our reality. Thank God that He knows nothing we can do or have done can change Creation. All we are doing is holding our ". . . return to Heaven back" (W.PII.Q4.5.7) by holding onto our misguided thoughts.
Just like the Prodigal Son, we believe we cannot return to our home until we clean up our act and become "good." Yet when the Prodigal Son returned home and told his father, "I have sinned against you and before Heaven, I am no longer worthy to be called your son," the father does not agree with the son's evaluation of himself by saying, "Yes, you have done wrong, but I as a good man will forgive you." Instead, he puts a gold ring on his son's finger, puts a cloak around him and sandals on his feet and arranges a celebration for the son who was lost and is now found. Where he went and what happened, did not matter. The level of illusion we get caught in does not matter. The only thing that matters is that we turn in the direction of our innocence, our happiness, and our peace, which will lead us home.
Jesus urges us to think about what we are doing and how long we want to maintain our game of sin. It is up to us. It is our choice. Nothing we have ever done is beyond correction. It is about our readiness ". . . to put away these sharp-edged children's toys." (W.PII.Q4.5.7) When will the time be? "How long, O holy Son of God, how long?" (W.PII.Q4.5.8) When will we be ready to return to the home we believe we had to leave because we had done something so bad God would never forgive us?
God assures us that He loves us and is waiting for our return. We, on the other hand, think because of what we have done we cannot go back home. We have run away from our home. Our Father is calling us back, but we feel so guilty and terrible about the things we have done that we feel we cannot return. Yet we keep asking God how long we have to be here and why doesn't He bring us back? We may wonder why this all-powerful God does not just take us back home. We get so discouraged when this spiritual journey home seems to be taking such a long time, and we just want out of here. What are we waiting for? We are waiting only for ourselves. We still don't realize we are playing the game of sin. We are believing a story that is not true. Until we give up our silly game of self-attack and punishment and guilt, we will continue to hold Heaven back, while all the time God is there in our minds, welcoming us home. We want to hold onto our identity and our specialness and make believe we can make ourselves safe in our little kingdom, separate from God.
This Lesson is calling on us to remember that no matter what we think we have done, have not done, or have failed to do, we are still innocent. The condemnation we have laid on our own heads is what is keeping us in the cycle of sin, guilt, and fear. Our belief in sin leads to guilt, and guilt demands punishment. This brings fear, and fear leads to self-defense. Yes, we did those awful things in the dream, but the dream is not real. Does this mean we can attack with impunity? Of course not. Jesus makes it clear that attack and anger are never justified. As long as we attack, we will feel guilty, and we will expect punishment. Our attack thoughts will keep us from knowing our true innocence.
The truth is that we are completely innocent because the world is not real and our game of sin and guilt is being played out in a dream we are dreaming. Whatever we have done in the dream did not actually happen. Therefore, sin cannot be real. The only reason the ego convinced the mind that sin is real is so we would be convinced our seeming rupture with God is permanent. The world arose from this thought and is a smokescreen for keeping the ego thought system in place.
Notice how no one ever admits they attack because they want to. Oprah once spoke of a survey where people were asked about how prevalent rudeness is in society. Most said rudeness was rampant in society, but when asked if they themselves were ever rude, 99% said they were not. They justified their behavior as a defense against the rudeness of others. Isn't that how it is with us? We think our attacks are justified. We make excuses for them. It is always about what someone else has done to us first. We need to take responsibility for our attacks, release our regrets and judgments we hold against ourselves, and recognize they have not changed our nature. We are innocent and so are all of our brothers. My sole responsibility is to accept the Atonement for myself and thus extend this same innocence to all of my brothers.
Today, each time you are tempted to get angry or upset about anything, realize you have simply made a wrong choice. The ego will always try to justify our upsets with a story. Be willing to release the story. Be willing to recognize you are wrong in the way you see it. Ask the Teacher, Who is already in your right mind, how to see the situation.
Ask yourself today, do I want to act on my judgments, or do I want to find a new interpretation of the situation so I can appropriately answer the call for love from my brother? I need to be open to acknowledging that the attack thoughts in my mind are not what I want. I can take a moment and step aside from the situation and agree to let these thoughts go. When I realize this is how I am holding Heaven back and keeping myself from my joy and peace, I will be motivated to choose again. As I turn my thoughts over to the Holy Spirit, I trust His healing will allow them to dissipate. If it is a persistent thought, it may come back. This is only because I have not totally given it over; but I can keep giving it over until the healing is accepted by my mind.
It is all about readiness and willingness. I ask for the holy instant to remember, "Whoever is saner at the time the threat is perceived should remember how deep is his indebtedness to the other and how much gratitude is due him, and be glad that he can pay his debt by bringing happiness to both." (T.18.V.7.1) (ACIM OE T.18.VI.47) I remind myself there is only one mind, so when the person who is saner at the time extends forgiveness, the other always receives it at some level. "And so I choose this instant as the one to offer to the Holy Spirit that His blessing may descend on us, and keep us both in peace." (T.18.V.7.6) (ACIM OE T.18.VI.48)
Love and blessings, Sarah
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IV. The Forgiveness of Specialness
26 Forgiveness is the end of specialness. Only illusions can be forgiven, and then they disappear. Forgiveness is release from
all illusions, and that is why it is impossible but partly to forgive. No one who clings to one illusion can see himself as sinless, for he holds one error to himself as lovely still. And so he calls it "unforgivable" and makes it sin. How can he then
give his forgiveness wholly, when he would not receive it for himself? For it is sure he would receive it wholly the instant that he gave it so. And thus his secret guilt would disappear, forgiven by himself.
27 Whatever form of specialness you cherish, you have made sin. Inviolate it stands, strongly defended with all your puny might against the Will of God. And thus it stands against yourself;
your enemy, not God's. So does it seem to split you off from God and make you separate from Him as its defender. You would protect what God created not. And yet this idol that seems to
give you power has taken it away. For you have given your brother's birthright to it, leaving him alone and unforgiven and yourself in sin beside him, both in misery before the idol that can save you not.
28 It is not
you that is so vulnerable and open to attack that just a word, a little whisper that you do not like, a circumstance that suits you not, or an event that you did not anticipate upsets your world and hurls it into chaos. Truth is not frail. Illusions leave it perfectly unmoved [and undisturbed]. But specialness is
not the truth in you.
It can be thrown off balance by anything. What rests on nothing
never can be stable. However large and overblown it seems to be, it still must rock and turn and whirl about with every breeze.
29 Without foundation nothing is secure. Would God have left His Son in such a state, where safety has no meaning? No, His Son is safe, resting on Him. It is your specialness that is attacked by everything that walks and breathes or creeps or crawls or even lives at all. Nothing is safe from its attack, and it is safe from nothing. It will forever more be unforgiving, for that is what it
is-a secret vow that what God wants for you will never be and that you will oppose His Will forever. Nor is it possible the two can ever be the same while specialness stands like a flaming sword of death between them and makes them "enemies."
30 God asks for your forgiveness. He would have no separation, like an alien will, rise between what He wills for you and what you will. They
are the same, for neither one wills specialness. How could they will the death of love itself? Yet they are powerless to make attack upon illusions. They are not bodies; as One Mind they wait for all illusions to be brought to them and left behind. Salvation challenges not even death. And God Himself, Who knows that death is not your will, must say, "Thy will be done" because
you think it
is.
31 Forgive the great Creator of the universe, the Source of life, of love and holiness, the perfect Father of a perfect Son, for your illusions of your specialness. Here is the hell you chose to be your home. He chose not this for you. Ask not He enter this. The way is barred to love and to salvation. Yet if you would release your brother from the depths of hell, you have forgiven Him Whose Will it is you rest forever in the arms of peace in perfect safety and without the heat and malice of one thought of specialness to mar your rest. Forgive the Holy One the specialness He could not give and which you made instead.
32 The special ones are all asleep, surrounded by a world of loveliness they do not see. Freedom and peace and joy stand there beside the bier on which they sleep and call them to come forth and waken from their dream of death. Yet they hear nothing. They are lost in dreams of specialness. They hate the call that would awaken them, and they curse God because He did not make their dream reality. Curse God and die, but not by Him Who made not death, but only in the dream. Open your eyes a little; see the savior God gave to you that you might look on him and give him back his birthright. It is
yours.
33 The slaves of specialness will yet be free. Such is the Will of God and of His Son. Would God condemn
Himself to hell and to damnation? And do
you will that this be done unto your savior? God calls to you from him to join His Will to save you
both from hell. Look on the print of nails upon his hands that he holds out for your forgiveness. God asks your mercy on His Son and on Himself. Deny them not. They ask of you but that your will be done. They seek your love that you may love yourself. Love not your specialness instead of them. The print of nails are on your hands as well. Forgive your Father. It was not His Will that you be crucified.
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