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A COURSE IN MIRACLES
CH 21 THE INNER PICTURE
V. THE FEAR TO LOOK WITHIN
47 And now the ego is afraid. Yet what it hears in terror, the other part hears as the sweetest music---the song it longed to hear since first the ego came into your minds. The ego's weakness is its strength. The song of freedom, which sings the praises of another world, brings to it hope of peace. For it remembers Heaven, and now it sees that Heaven has come to earth at last, from which the ego's rule has kept it out so long. Heaven has come because it found a home in your relationship on earth. And earth can hold no longer what has been given Heaven as its own.
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A COURSE IN MIRACLES
WORKBOOK for STUDENTS
Voice and Music by CIMS SonShip Radio
Salvation is a promise, made by God,
that you would find your way to Him at last.
It cannot but be kept. It guarantees
that time will have an end, and all the thoughts
that have been born in time will end as well.
God's Word is given every mind that thinks
that it has separate thoughts, and will replace
these thoughts of conflict with the Thought of peace.
The Thought of peace was given to God's Son
the instant that his mind had thought of war.
There was no need for such a Thought before,
for peace was given without opposite,
and merely was. But when the mind is split,
there is a need of healing. So the Thought
Which has the power to heal the split became
a part of every fragment of the mind
which still was one, but failed to recognize
its oneness. Now it did not know itself,
and thought its own identity was lost.
Salvation is undoing in the sense
that it does nothing, failing to support
the world of dreams and malice. Thus it lets
illusions go. By not supporting them,
it merely lets them quietly go down
to dust. And what they hid is now revealed;
an altar to the holy Name of God,
whereon His Word is written, with the gifts
of your forgiveness laid before It, and
the memory of God not far behind.
Let us come daily to this holy place,
and spend a while together. Here we share
our final dream. It is a dream in which
there is no sorrow, for it holds a hint
of all the glory given us by God.
The grass is pushing through the soil, the trees
are budding now, and birds have come to live
within their branches. Earth is being born
again in new perception. Night has gone,
and we have come together in the light.
From here we give salvation to the world,
for it is here salvation was received.
The song of our rejoicing is the call
to all the world that freedom is returned,
that time is almost over, and God's Son
has but an instant more to wait until
his Father is remembered, dreams are done,
eternity has shined away the world,
and only Heaven now exists at all.
~ Original Hand Script October 1, 1970
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L e s s o n 237
Now would I be as God created me.
<AUDIO><VIDEO>
Voice and Music by CIMS SonShip Radio
Today I will accept the truth about
myself. I will arise in glory, and
allow the light in me to shine upon
the world throughout the day. I bring the world
the tidings of salvation that I hear
as God my Father speaks to me. And I
behold the world that Christ would have me see,
aware it ends the bitter dream of death;
aware it is my Father's call to me.
Christ is my eyes today, and His the ears
which listen to the Voice of God today.
Father, I come to You through Him Who is
Your Son and my true Self as well. Amen
~ Original Handscript of ACIM October 10, 1970
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ACIM Edmonton - Sarah's Reflections
LESSON 237
Now would I be as God created me.
Sarah's Commentary:
Jesus reminds us, the Self we are is the Christ, the one Son of God. For two thousand years, it has exclusively been used in Christian theology to denote Jesus, God's only begotten Son. Jesus' specialness was further accentuated by St. Paul's relegating the rest of humanity to the status of "adopted sons" of God. (Galatians 4:4) In the Course, Jesus wants us to really embrace him as our equal and, therefore, he uses the term "Son of God" for all of us as the One Self. He makes it clear, we are not excluded from the designation of Son of God. He presents himself as no different from any of us. He is the symbol of the truth of who we are, buried deep in our minds. Again, we see the usage of the same form as in traditional Christianity, but with a totally different content.
Jesus reminds us, we are God's children who believe we are bodies and separate from our Source and, therefore, different from him, but this is not the truth. We are the Christ, not this person we think of as our current self. We are mistaken in our identity as a body and personality. I am the Christ, convinced I am something else. This need not be. "Now would I be as God created me." (W.237)
We heal the mistaken perceptions we hold about ourselves by changing our minds. In Chapter 21, there is a much-quoted line, "Therefore, seek not to change the world, but choose to change your mind about the world." (T.21.IN.1.7) (ACIM OE T.21.I) In the same way, we can choose to change our minds about the reactions we have to anything concerning us today. We can also change our minds about any negative reactions we hold to the way language is reflected in the Course. For example, you may have a negative reaction to the Christian terminology or to symbols like "Jesus" and "Christ," or words like "salvation, " "Last Judgment," and "sin," or to the male terminology. Just like anything else where we have a reaction, we can take what triggers us and use it for forgiveness.
The important thing we are reminded of in this Lesson is that we are not what we think we are. We have made a choice for the ego and have run away from the truth, yet we are as God created us. This thought frightens us because we have become invested in the self we have made and the world we still value, but it is a choice made by the mind; and the power is in our minds to choose again. "Now would I be as God created me." (W.237)
God did not create this body that I identify as myself. It is the result of choosing the ego thought system. The truth is we are the Christ, the Self that all of us share as the One Son. We are created in perfection. We are given the means (forgiveness) to undo what we have made. The Atonement Principle is our absolute insurance that it is impossible to mar our perfection as we were created, no matter what we do or have done. We have simply become unaware of our true nature.
The truth seems elusive when we identify with our ego. This world and our belief in bodies seem more real and solid than what is truly real. The ego is the choice for sin, guilt, and fear reflected in the differences, uniqueness, and specialness that we prize. When we get on the spiritual path, the ego can even make this experience one of spiritual specialness. We love our uniqueness and love to see ourselves as special even if that specialness involves suffering.
We value our perceptions, our thoughts, and our feelings. When we do not put them to doubt or question them, they run our lives. While our reactions feel natural to us, Jesus assures us that what we have learned is unnatural. Our nature is peace, joy, and innocence. We justify our positions and our perspectives, but they can only be maintained by denying reality. Jesus tells us this is not an easy thing to do. He says that what we have taught ourselves is an amazing learning feat. "What you have taught yourself is such a giant learning feat it is indeed incredible." (T.31.I.2.7) (ACIM OE T.31.I.2) Since we have achieved such an amazing feat of teaching ourselves that we are something we are not, the simplicity of this Course should be easy for us. Why it is not easy, he says, is because of our twisted thought system. "His message is not indirect, but He must introduce the simple truth into a thought system which has become so twisted and so complex you cannot see that it means nothing." (T.14.I.5.2) (ACIM OE T.13.VI.53) Yet, though it is twisted and complex, we still cling to it and fear what will become of us if we release our beliefs about ourselves and the world.
The ego is devious, self-serving, narcissistic, addicted to external sources of happiness, compares itself to others, is convinced it knows where its happiness lies, is afraid of true love and joining, is devious and a liar, and is arrogant in its insistence it is right about the way it has set up reality. All of this is false. It is all part of our twisted thinking. The only way to release it is to get very, very honest about ourselves. It is to look at the ego with honesty and courage. It is to inquire deeply into its motivations. It is to look with courage at the beliefs upholding our patterns.
We are being invited to release the thoughts that block our awareness of the truth. It takes considerable introspection, courage, and honesty to admit our motives. What was I trying to gain? For whose benefit was it? What was the purpose? What am I projecting onto others that reflects my own secret sins? Everything that comes up offers us an opportunity to open up to deeper levels of the ego thought system that we are holding onto. It all needs to be brought to awareness because we cannot heal what we do not acknowledge in ourselves and what we are not willing to take responsibility for.
The turning point for many of us on this spiritual path is when our lives go off track. It may be a divorce, infidelity, car accident, cancer, depression, loss of a loved one, loss of a job, financial loss, general malaise, or betrayal of some kind. At such times, we may initially want to escape into some form of safety or security that we believe will mitigate our situation, but these are generally the kind of circumstances that have motivated us to find another way. Such events may be what have brought us to this spiritual path. When we are brought to our knees, we become motivated to find a more solid foundation for our lives delivered in our work with this Course. Our own solutions for our problems only bring more pain and loss. They are generally focused on fixing the forms of this world based on our need for control, but we despair when our fixes do not work; and they never will. In this place of deep despair, our motivation is significantly heightened to find a new direction. It takes us inward, where we call on God in our desire to join with His Will rather than to keep relying on our own.
As the dark cornerstones of the ego are turned over to the Holy Spirit, we come to know the Self we are. It is a process of stepping back and allowing ". . . the light in me to shine upon the world throughout the day." (W.237.1.2) It is to allow the glory, the radiance, the love, and the light of what we are to radiate through us. It is not something we do. It is what we are. There is nothing we need to do to become what we already are. "The truth in you remains as radiant as a star, as pure as light, as innocent as love itself."(T.31.VI.7.4) (ACIM OE T.31.VI.67) It came with our specifications given by God. There is nothing we can do to change the truth. Can we really allow this thought to take hold? Can we accept this much grandeur and magnificence? Can we end this bitter dream of death today? Perhaps not today, but we can make choices moment by moment to bring the blocks to the inner altar for healing.
When we enter the silence and connect with the Truth in our minds, we ". . . behold the world that Christ would have me see," (W.237.1.4) and not the one we made. So, today, as every day, we are urged to go beyond the words to experience the love we are. These are not just beautiful thoughts and beautiful words to be contemplated but to be lived. To do so, we not only need to connect with the silence within but also to apply these thoughts whenever we are tempted to get upset about anything. This is a very practical Course, reminding us of the truth when we forget our reality and forget who walks with us in every moment.
Love and Blessings, Sarah
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V. The Fear to Look Within
41 The Holy Spirit will
never teach you that you are sinful. Errors He will correct, but this makes no one fearful. You are indeed afraid to look within and see the sin you think is there. This you would not be fearful to admit. Fear in association with sin the ego deems quite appropriate and smiles approvingly. It has no fear to let you feel ashamed. It doubts not your belief and faith in sin. Its temples do not shake because of this. Your faith that sin is there but witnesses to your desire that it
be there to see. This merely seems to be the source of fear.
42 Remember that the ego is not alone. Its rule
is tempered, and its unknown "enemy," Whom it cannot even see, it fears. Loudly the ego tells you not to look inward, for if you do, your eyes will light on sin, and God will strike you blind. This you believe, and so you do not look. Yet this is not the ego's hidden fear, nor yours who serve it. Loudly indeed the ego claims it is-
too loudly and
too often. For underneath this constant shout and frantic proclamation, the ego is not certain it is so. Beneath your fear to look within because of sin is yet another fear and one which makes the ego tremble.
43 What if you looked within and saw
no sin? This "fearful" question is one the ego
never asks. And you who ask it now are threatening the ego's whole defensive system too seriously for it to bother to pretend it is your friend. Those who have joined their brothers
have detached themselves from their belief that their identity lies in the ego. A holy relationship is one in which you join with what is part of you in
truth. And your belief in sin has been
already shaken, nor are you now entirely unwilling to look within and see it not.
44 Your liberation still is only partial---still limited and incomplete, yet born within you. Not wholly mad, you have been willing to look on much of your insanity and recognize its madness. Your faith is moving inward, past insanity and on to reason. And what your reason tells you now, the ego would not hear. The Holy Spirit's purpose was accepted by the part of your mind the ego knows not of. No more did
you. And yet this part with which you now identify is not afraid to look upon itself. It
knows no sin. How, otherwise, could it have been willing to see the Holy Spirit's purpose as its own?
45 This part has seen your brother and recognized him perfectly since time began. And it desired nothing but to join with him and to be free again, as once it was. It has been waiting for the birth of freedom, the acceptance of release to come to you. And now you recognize that it was not the ego that joined the Holy Spirit's purpose, and so there
must be something else. Think not that
this is madness. For this your
reason tells you, and it follows perfectly from what you have already learned.
46 There is no inconsistency in what the Holy Spirit teaches. This is the reasoning of the
sane. You have perceived the ego's madness and not been made afraid because you did not choose to share in it. At times it still deceives you. Yet in your saner moments, its ranting strikes no terror in your hearts. For you have realized that all the gifts it would withdraw from you in rage at your "presumptuous" wish to look within, you do not
want. A few remaining trinkets still seem to shine and catch your eye. Yet you would not "sell" Heaven to have them.
47 And now the ego
is afraid. Yet what it hears in terror, the other part hears as the sweetest music---the song it longed to hear since first the ego came into your minds. The ego's weakness is its strength. The song of freedom, which sings the praises of another world, brings to it hope of peace. For it
remembers Heaven, and now it sees that Heaven has come to earth at last, from which the ego's rule has kept it out so long. Heaven has come because it found a home in your relationship on earth. And earth can hold no longer what has been given Heaven as its own.
48 Look gently on each other and remember the ego's weakness is revealed in both your sight. What it would keep apart has met and joined, and looks upon the ego unafraid. Little children, innocent of sin, follow in gladness the way to certainty. Be not held back by fear's insane insistence that sureness lies in doubt. This has no meaning. What matters it to you how loudly it is proclaimed? The senseless is not made meaningful by repetition and by clamor. The quiet way is open. Follow it happily and question not what must be so.
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