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Living Differently is a newsletter of tips, ideas and information about grief, life and healing after loss.
Grieving, like living, involves all areas of life; emotional, cognitive, physical, spiritual, social, relational, nature and universal. We delve into all these areas plus offer messages from the other side to help you in your journey.
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With much gratitude,
Chris
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Note From Chris
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It's December.
Astrology nor numerology nor any calendar says it's the month of the body. (Have you ever heard of that? Me neither!) But, here at Living Differently, it is.
We are going to look at the different ways you and I tend to ignore our bodies and how this month, the month we normally equate with celebrations, we can focus on and care for our body.
Now I know this is not your usual focus as so many of us have holiday celebrations, year end activities and frantic deadlines we have self-imposed or are required to meet based on outer obligations.
Now possibly grieving has just changed your life so much that the year end is just another dreaded obligation or something you want to avoid.
But what if you can twist the view of this year end just a little bit?
What if you can open your eyes to see where you are just a little differently?
This is our aim for this month: a different focus, a twist on your focal point, zeroing in on a new thought for you, a spotlight on your body and your you.
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Living Differently Tip
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Living Differently Tip:
The following is from my ongoing messages/lessons/guidance shared by and received from the non-physical perspective ...my Guides, aka. Maxx
This message holds a mini-lesson for all of us...
(usually I hear a phrase, a subject or they make a comment and then they explain their lesson...)
The Light of You This Season
Yes, this is the season to be merry. Everyone around you, it seems is merry and bright. Some are, some are not. But you can be or not. Being bright is not just emanating light on you but in you too. Switch your focus to see that light in you. The light from above is helpful for you to see what is on and in your outer world but your own light helps you see your way. Lighting your own path enables you to see the grander picture, the greater view around you because you illuminated it with your own light. That light shines to help you see your way as well as helps you grow what is appearing to and for you. Do the necessary caring for you to turn on your light, to maintain its glow and to expand your sight(/site). You can only do this with and in conjunction with the body's assistance. Notice it. Feed it. And care for you as you round this corner in your world.
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Zac Comment:
Christmas time. Christmas time. Yes, I can give you words to the affect of caring for your body but it isn't just bodily care that is necessary now but noticing how the body reacts in relation TO how you care for it. Notice the things you love. How do you feel? Notice the things that annoy you or make you anxious. Avoid them. Notice the things you dread. Bypass them. Guarding your body this month means taking care of all of you in your processing. Love you as you care for you. We do. And we want you to have a Merry Christmas. Take care of you as you will be creating that for you if you do.
Your spirit helpers are with you all the time. They want to help you and they have a way of letting you know in a way you will understand...
Your job is to learn to trust them! You can have the comfort of your spirit guides and loved ones to ease the burdens of your physical life. I encourage you to embrace your connections.
Do you have questions? Please let me know..
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Being Your Body Self-Care
Body Self-Care Before
You might say, "Of course I know how to take care of myself because I have been doing it all my life." Which is true.
But life has changed since your loss. And you know that is also true!
But caring for your self/Self is a new ballgame as you move through your living after loss.
If I managed so well before, how is it different now?
Some may not see a difference in their own self-care, emotional management, coping mechanism used, health and wellness levels or any other functioning used pre-or post a major life loss.
But many grievers have so many unanswerable questions plaguing them that sometimes moving beyond them appears quite impossible.
Such is often the case with self-care.
We discuss managing symptoms of grief and offer tips on activities to bring relief in relation to anxiety, fear, anger, traumatic concerns and somatic difficulties.
But laying a groundwork for self-care remains fluid, unrecognizable and confusing.
Let's go to step one to observe the process before taking your steps.
It's My Different Body Now
Caring for your body is taking care of and then practicing the to-do list of healthy activities you create to make your body healthy again. But,
- It is also knowing what you are doing to your body and whether or not that activity is helpful for you. That is a main point in recognition of caring for your body and discovering your light.
- The importance is not merely in participating in the action like: exercising, drinking water, socializing, taking care of your physical organs, etc. It is the awareness of that care taking of you that supports your progress in your process of grieving
- This awareness also develops that YOU that you are taking with you on your journey. That is the light within.
We all want to "shine our light" or "be a light in the world" or "offer someone a model or example for living" and those are secondary steps to the development of you. This development is:
- Taking that original action of following those steps in your process and being aware of what you are doing and that you are doing them.
- The second one is noticing what you want to do so that you can choose to take a step or choose not to take that step.
- The third is integrating this all into you; your process, your journey.
- Your light brightens and illuminates your path with that awareness of your own journey and of who you are becoming.
It is the becoming that brightens your living of your journey.
This season, although this may be difficult, I invite you to step back just a moment from your ongoing self-care practice.
You may not have been paying attention to what your body is telling you. Consider your body. Pay attention to it. Ask yourself questions about its functioning. What is it telling you?
After you have some awareness of your body and understand what it is telling you, notice that you have a choice, at that moment, whether to integrate that learning or not.
Recognizing this technique of laying your foundation of self-care is not an all-inclusive, easy three-step process. But know that in doing so, you will be creating your growth and movement in your healing journey.
I wish you peaceful moments in your holiday and the celebrations that will surround you and your caring self this month.
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Move Your Body With Shower Dancing
Yes, we KNOW that moving our body is good for us just like we know the words to the familiar Christmas Carols we hear year after year. But hearing the song and singing the song are two different things. Just like hearing the suggestions and doing the suggestions!
But...
Try Shower Dancing.
This may not be an easy thing to do and you may not feel like dancing but we are suggesting this anyway!
Just bring your favorite music into your bathroom with you, breath deeply and move your body to the music (add singing too as it keeps your brain and heart healthy and produces hormones that can reduce stress, anxiety and elevate your mood)
You'll be doing yourself a triple favor by deep breathing, by being surrounded by water and moving your body. (these topics were addressed in these links to past Living Differently newsletters)
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Christmas Gratitude
This is a very cute 1:44 minute video that reminds us to appreciate the gifts we already have.
We know dealing with a loss at Christmas time may be difficult. But remember, this is a reminder not a rule.
If you are not able to see your way with gratitude or if feeling gratitude may be difficult this Christmas, perhaps this little video might be a seed for next year's observation of the holidays.
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Christmas Message to Bereaved Parents
Wednesday, 12-20-17: I was wondering if they (Maxx) were going to share a Christmas message and with that thought they said:
"Your kiddos are closer than your physical reach. When you are able to imagine in your wildest imagination, your spirituality of your spirit will allow you to be closer to your child. Your child waits for that moment but not impatiently because they understand. Allow you to feel the pain as well as feeling that joy of that incredibly heightened relationship that you now have as a possibility. It is in your hands. It is in your realm of reality regardless of the pain. The pain can remain but your joy will grow with your acceptance of this possibility. And know that it is really not a possibility, it is reality but that is your job to come to that realization through your physical existence of acceptance. Your children are so close. Closer than humanly possible. Open your heart now. You opened your arms, now open your heart. They are there. They are there not only with you but cheering you on and celebrating you and celebrating with you."
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Himalayan Bath Salt Bath
Do you know that your body is your psychic antenna? So doesn't it make sense to take care of it if you are wanting strengthen your intuition, your spirituality and your connection to your loved ones who have left their physical bodies.
One way to stay connected to your body is by taking Himalayan Bath Salt baths. Add: 1 c. Himalayan Bath Salts, 1 c. Epsom Salts and one box of baking soda. (add essential oils if you like)
By doing so you will:
1. De-stress by regulating hormones that helps concentration and reduces tension.
2. Absorb many minerals through skin absorption.
3.
Detoxify your body of all the toxic chemicals you come in contact with daily.
4. Eases aches and pains, joints muscles and reduces inflammation
5. Increases your ability to sleep better
6. Deep cleans your skin with its antibacterial and antiseptic properties.
7. Stimulates blood circulation
8. Offers respiratory system relief.
Spend at least 20 - 30 minutes in a body temperature tub and drink water or herbal tea. (to amplify the effects inside and out)
Now doesn't that sound like a great way to take care of yourself?
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Daily information and inspiration
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(We post blog posts, Wednesday Wisdom (from Maxx, Zac and others on the other side) Friday Funnies, interaction, ask questions and a whole lot more on the Facebook page)
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Request: I'd love to hear from you... do you have questions or comments about this newsletter?
Are there subjects you'd like to hear about? Please let me know....
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and this month's a final thought...
Hopefully you've gained a few ideas so your refrigerator does not tempt you during the holidays!
Until next month...
If you have questions, comments or subjects you'd like addressed in this newsletter, please let us know...
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Please visit my blog here. I'd love to hear your comments or questions or have you share your experiences of your continued relationship with your loved one.
For a whole lot of years now we have been sharing information about signs, celebrating your child's birthday, dreams, pet loss, parental loss, ADCs, continuing relationships, conversations with the other side, holiday grief, bereaved parents' grief and a whole lot more!
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Chris Mulligan is an intuitive grief guide, teacher and author of Afterlife Agreements: A Gift From Beyond who is passionate about inspiring and guiding others to choose to live differently after grief, to change their pain to hope and their suffering to living on. Her passion is fueled by her own transformation when her youngest son, Zac died in 2000 and she found herself enduring a shattered world she did not expect to inhabit. Receiving guidance through signs and communication from her son and other spirits, her life path shifted from living in grief to living on. She discovered her truth when she chose to open her heart and live life differently. From that place, she fearlessly created an abundant life full of gifts, gratitude and grace. A MS in Clinical Child, Youth, and Family Work, 25 years of Adoption Social Work, hospice volunteering, facilitating grief support groups and being her parents' end of life and transitional caregiver have taught her about pain and peace. She frequently speaks on panels and workshops for the bereaved and those working with the bereaved. She loves spending time with her husband and family of two dogs, Nina and Sam, four children and four grandchildren. She has been receiving images and messages from those on the other side for over 16 years and is currently writing a book incorporating their teachings. Go to http://www.Afterlifebooks.com to learn more.
With much gratitude, Chris |
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