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Happy Tuesday!
Back from my whirlwind 24 hour trip to Toronto! Had time to re-watch The Revenant and Chicago on the plane.
"HOW DO I MANAGE MY CHILD COMING IN
AND OUT OF MY LIFE?"
-
It's typically best to let the adult child come in and out as
they see fit. Sometimes it
isn't
personal and other times it may start out not personal but become personal if the child feels criticized for wanting to be in charge of how much contact there
is.
-
Try not to sound critical if you're observing that your child is less available than they
were
before. Our adult children often have busy lives, and while they're at the forefront of our minds, we're not necessarily at the forefront of
theirs.
-
Criticizing or complaining rarely buys you anything. If your child acts triggered you could
say
in a friendly or
upbeat
way, "You didn't do anything wrong. I just love seeing you.
I
know you have your own
life."
-
Or if there was an earlier complaint about you that you have tried to repair you can
say
something like "Wondering if you're still having feelings about the past? The door's
always open
to talk about
that."
If you need more help deciding whether to keep trying with your estranged child, join us:
TONIGHT!
,May 31
530 PM Pacific, 630 PM Mountain,
730 PM Central, 830 PM Eastern
SHOULD I KEEP TRYING OR JUST GIVE UP?
Learning to Make the Right Decision
Here's what's coming up!
Tuesday, June 7
530 PM Pacific, 630 PM Mountain,
730 PM Central, 830 PM Eastern
SHOULD I CUT THEM OUT OF MY WILL?
Handling the Issue of Money, Gifts, and Inheritance
Tuesday, June 14
530 PM Pacific, 630 PM Mountain,
730 PM Central, 830 PM Eastern
DOES MY CHILD HAVE A PERSONALITY DISORDER OR OTHER MENTAL ILLNESS?
Understanding Its Role in Estrangement
Tuesday, June 21
530 PM Pacific, 630 PM Mountain,
730 PM Central, 830 PM Eastern
MY ESTRANGED CHILD IS BACK: NOW WHAT?
Learning How to Navigate Early
Reconciliation
Each webinar comes with:
- Free study guide
- Link to the live webinar to listen to over the phone or computer
- Q and A during live webinar
- Complete transcript of lecture after it airs
- Link to the webinar recording after it airs
To hear what others are saying about the webinars, go
here
CAN'T MAKE THE WEBINARS AT THE TIME SCHEDULED?
No problem- you'll still get the full transcript of the lecture, the study guide, and the link to the recording.
WANT TO CONTACT OTHER
ESTRANGED PARENTS?
About Dr. Coleman
Dr. Coleman is a psychologist in private practice in the San Francisco Bay Area and a Senior Fellow with the Council on Contemporary Families, a non-partisan organization of leading sociologists, historians, psychologists and demographers dedicated to providing the press and public with the latest research and best-practice findings about American families. He has lectured at Harvard University, The University of California at Berkeley, The University of London, Cornell Weill Medical School, and blogs on parent-adult child relationships for the U.C. Berkeley publication, Greater Good Magazine.
Dr. Coleman is frequently contacted by the media for opinions and commentary about changes in the American family. He has been a frequent guest on the Today Show, NPR, and The BBC, and has also been featured on Sesame Street, 20/20, Good Morning America, America Online Coaches, PBS, and numerous news programs for FOX, ABC, CNN, and NBC television. His advice has appeared in The New York Times, The Times of London, The Shriver Report, Fortune, Newsweek, The Chicago Tribune, The Wall Street Journal, Slate, Psychology Today, U.S. World and News Report, Parenting Magazine, The Baltimore Sun and many others.
He is the author of numerous articles and chapters and has written four books: The Marriage Makeover: Finding Happiness in Imperfect Harmony (St. Martin's Press); The Lazy Husband: How to Get Men to Do More Parenting and Housework (St. Martin's Press); When Parents Hurt: Compassionate Strategies When You and Your Grown Child Don't Get Along (HarperCollins); and Married with Twins: Life, Love and the Pursuit of Marital Harmony. His books have been translated into Chinese, Croatian, and Korean, and are also available in the U.K., Canada, and Australia.
He is the co-editor, along with historian Stephanie Coontz of seven online volumes of Unconventional Wisdom: News You Can Use, a compendium of noteworthy research on the contemporary family, gender, sexuality, poverty, and work-family issues.
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