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Happy Tuesday!
I hope your week is off to a good start.
If you missed yesterday's
FREE Q AND A!
you can get the replay here
CREATING MORE DISTANCE BETWEEN
Y
OU AND YOUR PAIN
Research on the practice of mindfulness has shown it to be an effective remedy for anxiety, depression, and rumination (turning a thought over and over). For parents who are suffering with an estrangement, learning how to cultivate this mindset can be an essential tool toward a life of greater serenity. Here are some of the essential principles:
When you feel triggered by some experience related to your estranged child such a memory, a Facebook post, seeing others with their friends or grandchildren, try the following:
* Become curious about your experience. How do you feel emotionally? What kind of thoughts are going through your head? What does your body feel like at the moment?
*Accept what you're feeling in that moment. Acceptance doesn't mean resignation to it, rather an acknowledgement of your feeling whether it's anger, sorrow, fear, jealousy, etc .
*
Self-compassion
- Try to not judge yourself for whatever it is you're feeling, however unappealing it may be to you. Say, "Yep, that's what I'm feeling right now." Observe whatever you are experiencing as it is, rather than classifying it into good or bad, like or dislike.
*Let go - allow the feeling to pass rather than to become consumed by it.
Finally, understand that change takes time and it takes practice.
If you need more help learning ways to heal from your estrangement, join us TONIGHT:
Tuesday, May 24
530 PM Pacific, 630 PM Mountain,
730 PM Central, 830 PM Eastern
HOW DO I COPE WITH THE PAIN?
Learning the Best Ways to Respond
Here's what's coming up!
Tuesday, May 31
530 PM Pacific, 630 PM Mountain,
730 PM Central, 830 PM Eastern
SHOULD I KEEP TRYING OR JUST GIVE UP?
Learning to Make the Right Decision
Tuesday, June 7
530 PM Pacific, 630 PM Mountain,
730 PM Central, 830 PM Eastern
SHOULD I CUT THEM OUT OF MY WILL?
Handling the Issue of Money, Gifts, and Inheritance
Tuesday, June 14
530 PM Pacific, 630 PM Mountain,
730 PM Central, 830 PM Eastern
DOES MY CHILD HAVE A PERSONALITY DISORDER OR OTHER MENTAL ILLNESS?
Understanding Its Role in Estrangement
Tuesday, June 21
530 PM Pacific, 630 PM Mountain,
730 PM Central, 830 PM Eastern
MY ESTRANGED CHILD IS BACK: NOW WHAT?
Learning How to Navigate Early
Reconciliation
Each webinar comes with:
- Free study guide
- Link to the live webinar to listen to over the phone or computer
- Q and A during live webinar
- Complete transcript of lecture after it airs
- Link to the webinar recording after it airs
To hear what others are saying about the webinars, go
here
CAN'T MAKE THE WEBINARS AT THE TIME SCHEDULED?
No problem- you'll still get the full transcript of the lecture, the study guide, and the link to the recording.
WANT TO CONTACT OTHER
ESTRANGED PARENTS?
About Dr. Coleman
Dr. Coleman is a psychologist in private practice in the San Francisco Bay Area and a Senior Fellow with the Council on Contemporary Families, a non-partisan organization of leading sociologists, historians, psychologists and demographers dedicated to providing the press and public with the latest research and best-practice findings about American families. He has lectured at Harvard University, The University of California at Berkeley, The University of London, Cornell Weill Medical School, and blogs on parent-adult child relationships for the U.C. Berkeley publication, Greater Good Magazine.
Dr. Coleman is frequently contacted by the media for opinions and commentary about changes in the American family. He has been a frequent guest on the Today Show, NPR, and The BBC, and has also been featured on Sesame Street, 20/20, Good Morning America, America Online Coaches, PBS, and numerous news programs for FOX, ABC, CNN, and NBC television. His advice has appeared in The New York Times, The Times of London, The Shriver Report, Fortune, Newsweek, The Chicago Tribune, The Wall Street Journal, Slate, Psychology Today, U.S. World and News Report, Parenting Magazine, The Baltimore Sun and many others.
He is the author of numerous articles and chapters and has written four books: The Marriage Makeover: Finding Happiness in Imperfect Harmony (St. Martin's Press); The Lazy Husband: How to Get Men to Do More Parenting and Housework (St. Martin's Press); When Parents Hurt: Compassionate Strategies When You and Your Grown Child Don't Get Along (HarperCollins); and Married with Twins: Life, Love and the Pursuit of Marital Harmony. His books have been translated into Chinese, Croatian, and Korean, and are also available in the U.K., Canada, and Australia.
He is the co-editor, along with historian Stephanie Coontz of seven online volumes of Unconventional Wisdom: News You Can Use, a compendium of noteworthy research on the contemporary family, gender, sexuality, poverty, and work-family issues.
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