The second temple was built in the merit of achdut (unity). Achdut doesn't mean being a cookie cutter replica. It's having a central sense of a common goal and recognizing that the objective can't be reached by any one individual. It's respecting every Jew who's headed in that same direction in their own way. There's no classical Hebrew word for tolerance because it isn't a Jewish value. Love, compassion, kindness, and patience are. The Gemara tells us that the Jews are the most argumentative of all people. But it's about love of truth. In a more mellow society you would hear, "I respect your truth, you respect mine." But in reality they are saying, "I don't know the truth," because truth by definition is the whole picture. When you equalize ideas because they are both ideas, you're saying there's no such thing as objectivity or truth. How could we talk about unity when by our nature we are argumentative? The love of truth is what unites us. You could love someone for their pursuit of emet, for their sincerity, and for reaching what they could reach without necessarily thinking they've arrived at their goal. It's very different than saying this is my truth and this is your truth. In essence, we're all climbing the same ladder. You may be up to rung 552 and I may be up to 401. But we're all aiming for the same end point.

Loving someone means feeling one with the other person. It doesn't mean blinding yourself to their failings. It's viewing them as someone who wants what you want. All Jews share a common spark of the same soul. Ahavat Yisrael is training oneself to see what's admirable and good in the other person while at the same time not expecting them to be just like you. We're not all meant to see the world in the same way, but we are meant to see it with the three distinctive Jewish traits, shame, compassion, and loving kindness. A sense of shame is feeling uncomfortable when you're not as you should be or things aren't as they should be. On the highest level, having a sense of shame means having an awareness of Hashem that's so immediate and so real, that there's inner trembling before Him. People may have shame in the wrong areas such as getting old, not having the right profession, or gaining weight. The direction may be misguided, but the quality is holy. So when you talk to someone whose shame is misguided don't let yourself be distracted by it. Go to the core, the holy shame, that tells you this person wants to be a tzadik.

The second trait is having mercy. When we see suffering we're compelled to respond. This comes from our forefather Yitzchak and our need and ability to give of ourselves to others. It comes from seeing the truth, the midah of Yaakov. When you see the whole picture you see what's perfect as well as what isn't. Your love of perfection is going to say, don't ignore what is black. You have to want to see and be willing to do something to bring about change even if it involves self -sacrifice. The third trait is chesed. Jews love to give, not out of pity, but out of the overflowing good inside them that yearns for an address. This comes from our forefather Avraham.

Ahavat Yisrael demands not just that one look for this trait, but that one talk about it. When you see something that's moving, find the right person to share it with. We're influenced by our own words and it make us see things differently. In addition, it creates unity between ourselves and the listener. What you say will touch the part of the listener that's like the person you're talking about.

Ahavat Yisrael means treating people with respect. It's penetrating their externality and believing that there's something there that deserves that respect. One of the ten names of the soul is kavod-honor. There's a spark in everyone's soul that craves significance. The more you give someone kavod, the more his spiritual side comes forth. This is true for everyone including your spouse and children. If you can find the part of them that wants kavod and yearns for respect, and speak to them on that level, it can have a powerful impact. The tricky part is we also want kavod. We have an irrational mechanism that if he's number one, I'm number two. But in truth kavod is immaterial. You can give endless kavod and not lose any of your own.

Ahavat Yisrael means being helpful. You have to care about a person's financial, physical, and material well being. The more you respond to someone's vulnerability by helping them, the more bonded you feel with them as your own memories of your imperfections surface. In addition, when you are in the position of giver, your best self comes forth which makes you feel one with the recipient. The laws of ahavat Yisrael compel us to see what is positive in other people in order to respond to them with authenticity. The more you give yourself permission to see people's inherent yearning for goodness, no matter how misguided it is, the more it will hurt you that it is misguided. Instead of hating them for their bad choices, empathize with the pain of their pettiness and wrongness. Ahavat Yisrael doesn't mean acting as if everyone has reached that elusive goal called perfect. It's choosing to relate to the part of them that wants that goal regardless of who they are, and doing whatever you can to help them get there.

Every tragedy is a consequence of galut. We fall because of Amalek, the source of doubt within us. Defeating Amalek means having collective consciousness. It's drawing down revelation of Hashem only promised to the klal through mesirat nefesh. The more physical our self- definition is, the less possibility there is for achdut. We must try to get past material considerations. We have to drop the senseless competition. We need the collective merit of am Yisrael to bring the redemption and it will only happen through unity.