Love after heartbreak...

Voices from foster care.

I was at court recently with two wonderful sisters. These lovely young women had just heard their parents say some mighty terrible things after the parents had done some mighty terrible things. The younger sister said that she didn't need love - not family love, not romantic love, just no love. "All these people are supposed to love you. But they don't."

It got me thinking. Love just doesn't look like what we think it does to a lot of kids.We want all kids to have loving families and to feel safe and protected. But that doesn't always happen. Some kids get taken in by relatives or get new families through adoption or foster care. Some have great friends and support at work or school. They look for ways to let love in - even while saying it doesn't matter.

We are dedicating this Valentine's Day to all the ways that people create loving families and loving relationships even in the face of terrible obstacles. We are dedicating this Valentine's Day to all the people who hang in there and help our kids and young adults have faith that love is possible, and patience as they find their way.

Sue

Susan Conwell

Executive Director

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Love and loss are sometimes companions.

What does love look like to a foster teen? It's hard because even when people love you, someone you love has really let you down. This poem tells the story.

-KMI

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New families: When parents foster or adopt they bring a child to the extended family who may have questions or concerns as well as love.

This grandpa was initially concerned that his soon to be granddaughter was born addicted to heroin. Love makes your heart grow nine sizes in spite of the worries. Here's a story he wrote for little Cecilia:

-KMI

Hola Cecilia, I want to tell you a little love story.

Abuelito, remember that I am nine months old. I only know about clean diapers, a bottle with warm juicy milk, lots of kisses, and hearing my name, Cecilia, all the time.

Well, Cecilia, that is the story I wanted to tell you about. The parents that gave you deep blue eyes and your entire body were sick and could not give you all you needed to grow. Because they loved you, even though they were very, very sad, they handed you to the parents who now, day and night, are nurturing your growth. And this is because they love you.

I got it. That is why I smile all the time. Isn't? That is why I am so happy. Abuelito, this story about love is really about my own story. Now, I know what love is, even though I am only nine months old. Gracias, abuelito.

Painting by Judy Byrnes

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These three grandchildren wanted to express their love for their Grandmother. Here's a letter they wrote in appreciation of her.

-KMI

Dear Grandma,

Thanks for being both grandma and mom. Thanks for all the times you didn't say something about my parents--about them letting you down or letting me down. Thanks for believing in me and keeping the faith. You make my journey and my joy possible. I know what love is because of you.

-J, M and K

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A Special Valentine for Girls in Foster Care

First Row (Left to Right): Sloane, Zoe, Grace, Finley, Olivia (organizer), Claire (organizer)

Back Row (Left to Right): Olivia, Kate, Sentibel, Gaby Not Pictured: Scout, Lindsey & Sarah

Claire and Olivia and their friends Sloane, Zoe, Grace, Finley, Olivia, Kate, Sentibel, Gaby, Scout, Lindsey and Sarah love Valentine's Day. They learned about foster care and want to make sure that other girls enjoy the day as they do. They celebrate Valentine's Day by making special Valentine's Day boxes that include treats like stationary, scarves, stuffed animals, nail polish, lotion, hair ties and CHOCOLATE. They are bringing smiles across Milwaukee.

You may remember the saying, "The things you take for granted someone else is praying for." These girls are making sure that our kids feel special. Surely an answer to many prayers. A big thank you to all!

Love grows in foster care..

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"You have a very loving relationship with your foster

mom. How did that relationship develop?"

-KMI

"The love isn't immediate, but it's the consistent loving actions that turn into the true love between a parent and child.

It takes time to heal a hurting heart, but there is no better way to get there than by showing your love in more ways than just in words.

My foster mom showed her love by taking me to school, being there to pick me up from school, asking how my day was, setting boundaries, and just merely being present in my life."

-Brigette S.

Former Foster Youth

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Sharon and Kaya

Love is when a child asks you to be the person she wants in her life.

Kaya asked, "Can you be my

grandma? "

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"How do you love the children so much and still work with families so they can return home?"

-KMI

"I just always remind myself of the wisdom of the bear Winnie-the-Pooh: How lucky I am to have something in my life that makes saying Good bye so hard.
"

-Paulette D.

Longtime Foster Parent

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"The love that saw me through foster care? It was when people loved me at my worst. I think that's when it's hardest to love someone. I will never deny that I can be difficult at times, but those who love me in the difficult times mean the most to me."

-Amanda S.

Foster Youth Alum

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Kids Matter Inc.

(414) 344-1220