What is really going on?

November 2015

Strengthening Your Relationships: Part 3 - What is Really Going On?

The Topic of an Argument Isn't Always Important

Practice Exercise

When you have time for reflection, go to a memory where you can't really remember the words or the content of what was discussed, but you still remember how you felt. There is both information and wisdom in connecting to how you felt as it gives you deep insight as to what is really going on. Write down what you can learn from yourself and for yourself. Your power comes from your ability to hold the bigger picture.

About Beverley Pugh

"Every joy is gain. And gain is gain, however small."

- Robert Browning

Beverley has been a practicing counsellor for over 30 years. She has worked extensively in Canada, Australia, Japan, and Thailand. Beverley currently has a full-time practice on the North Shore. Beverley has a highly intuitive ability to help people uproot core issues that are holding them back from moving forward to where they want to be in terms of their own self-growth. She works extensively with couples and families and individuals with numerous presenting issues.

Visit The Mastery Of Health and Happiness Website

Visit Beverley Pugh & Associates Counselling Services at

www.beverleypugh.com

Strengthening Your Relationships

Part 3 - What is Really Going On?

"It's not the words we remember, but the way we felt when the words were said."

- Bev Pugh

When I was at graduate school studying relationship counselling, I remember one of the key pivotal themes. When people are talking, focus not on the words but on what they "do" (intentionally or unintentionally) with what they say. The story or the words is the Content, and the Process is what we "do" with what we say. I was really drilled on this one.

My teacher was Dr. Mel Gooderham and he was as sharp as they come. I was very privileged to learn from him. I studied in Toronto at a Counselling Centre that had one-way mirrors. Clients payed very little money and as students, we sat behind the mirror and learned from the pros. Then it was our turn, and each one of our sessions was observed through the one-way mirror. A bit nerve racking!

The Topic of an Argument Isn't Always Important

By Virginia, who listens with an open heart.

I have a husband and two kids under the age of 6. I would dread it when my husband would come home. He would get the kids all excited and they would be late for bed. I would have to mop up the mess the next day. We rarely argued, and after a while we emotionally separated from one another. Our marriage suffered.

I hope my story and Virginia's have inspired you. Let me know if you notice any changes in your life!

Bev

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