Rabbi Robert Goldstein's Sermon
Friday Evening, June 26, 2015
Today's Supreme Court decision, lauded by most Americans, reviled by others, represents a sea change in how we in American view marriage. The majority of the justices affirmed that human beings express love in different ways, and in the absence of violence or coercion, our fellow Americans may express their love any way they see fit.
I remember not too long ago having a discussion, more of an argument with the former Pastor of Free Christian Church here in Andover. He's a good man, and a close friend. Together we hosted a local access television show called "Faith Matters." The good Pastor is a social conservative; I am far more liberal. I am not breaking any confidences since many of the discussions he and I had on this subject took place on our show...which few people actually watched.
Ten years ago when gay married became legal in Massachusetts, the reverend was horrified. He found the very idea of it revolting for it went against every one of his religious beliefs. In fact he, along with other like-minded citizens worked tirelessly to overturn the decision.
I remember asking him, why did it matter to him so much? "Because the next thing they'll do is require me to officiate at same-sex unions." I assured him that would never happen...I suggested to my good friend that if a man and woman of the Jewish faith came to him and asked him to do their wedding, unless they professed a belief in Jesus Christ, I doubt he would do the wedding...and certainly the state has no interest in forcing a minister, priest or rabbi to bless a union in which religious differences would cause the clergyman or woman to compromise their beliefs.
I didn't convince him.
I further pressed my friend, "Will same-sex marriage have some effect on your marriage...will it diminish your love for your wife...or for that matter will it have any negative impact on anyone's marriage?"
His answer was that if same sex marriage became the law of the land, it would fray the already unraveling fabric of the American family. Again, I suggested that I am not sure there is a correlation between the increased divorce rate or the number of American babies born out of wedlock, or whatever reasonable, or for that matter arbitrary measure one uses to gage the strength of the American family and the nation's more liberal views on the matter of same sex marriage.
Shortly after same-sex marriage became legal in Massachusetts, I officiated at my first gay ceremony. I would be lying if I did not admit to feeling a degree of anxiety...not because I disagreed with the concept, or felt it was morally wrong, certainly not that. The ceremony was private, just a few very close relatives. The couple had been together for a number of years; they were committed to each other and the children they shared. I was just worried I'd mess up the pronouns!
Their love for each other, the joys and challenges of creating a life together are the same as they are for any of us fortunate enough to have found a loving partner.
When all is said and done, I believe that God created a world that is complex and at times unpredictable; and He fashioned human beings-each of us-with our own distinctions and differences. We have the capacity to act with dignity, nobility and grace, and at times, sadly we can easily slip into intolerance and narrow-mindedness.
Last week the sacred space of a church was violated; this singular act of horror took only a few seconds to be completed. But in the hours, the days, the week that followed, people of good will gathered to express their horror, their rejection of the ugly bigotry that inspired such an unspeakable crime.
And today, our Supreme Court decided that our government, a government of laws could not, should not determine whom we love. Again, bigotry and intolerance were rejected, the dignity for every American, no matter their orientation was upheld, and as our President said, "Today we are a more perfect union."
And to that I say...Amen
